Parshas Yitro - giving advice

Moshe’s father in law, Yitro, arrives at the Israelite encampment in the desert and observes that Moshe spends an entire day adjudicating disputes between people, “from the morning until the evening.” Yitro tells his son in law: The thing you are doing is not good. You will surely wear away both yourself and this nation that is with thee, the thing is too heavy for you; you cannot do all this alone. Now, listen to my voice and I’ll give you some advice, and may God be with you; you should be for the people before God and bring the matters before God. And you should instruct them on the statutes and the laws and let them know the way that they should go and the work they should do. And you should arrange from all the people able men, God-fearing, truthful, and honest; and you should place them as officers over thousands, officers over hundreds, officers over fifties, and officers over tens. Let them judge the people at all times and every great matter they should bring to you but every small matter they shall judge and they will bear (the burden) with you. If this idea you shall do, and God commands you so, then you’ll be able to endure, and also all this people shall come to its place in peace. (Exodus 18: 17-23). Moshe accepts the advice and promptly implements it.

I suggest that Moshe’s easy acquiescence to Yitro’s advice was not merely smart family politics but, rather, was a product of the wisdom of Yitro’s ideas as well as his wise manner of delivery.

Can we learn from Yitro’s success as an advice giver? There may be a few principles worth gleaning from the situation:

1)     Only offer advice to someone with whom you have a close personal relationship

(Moshe had already affirmed the closeness of his bond with his father in law, by greeting him warmly on his arrival; 18:7-9).   

2)     Delineate the danger first, clearly, yet without exaggeration. (“You will surely wear away both yourself and this nation that is with thee.”) Then offer suggestions.

3)     Offer a solution that includes specific, practical ideas.

And, perhaps most critically, as Rabbi Yeroham Levovitch noted …

4)     Be the kind of person who demonstrates a healthy capacity for self-criticism and growth

(Note that before he offers advice Yitro, who the text describes as “the priest of Midian” (18:1), heard the news of the Exodus and remarked: “Now I know that the Lord is greater than all the gods.” The priest of another nation readily admited the superiority of the Jewish God, demonstrating his openness to change his perspective in the face of new evidence.)

I welcome comments on this Dvar Torah. The best way to reach me is through this email address: donlegofzechut@yahoo.com