As Moshe recounts the days after the Jewish people conquered
kings Sichon and Og, he recalls a personal moment: “I pleaded (Ve’eschanan) to
Adonoy at that time, saying: Adonoy, Elohim, you have begun to show your
servant Your greatness and your powerful hand, that there is no power in Heaven
or Earth that can perform Your deeds and Your acts of power. Please, let me
cross over and see the good land that is across the Jordan, this good mountain
and the Lebanon.” (Deuteronomy 3:23-25).
Rashi, noting the use of the uncommon term Ve’eschanan,
explains that the root of the word is HeeNoon, which signifies an undeserved
gift. Rashi states that while the righteous might seek rewards from God based
on their exemplary service and their many good deeds, they don’t try to seek
favors from God based on their merits; instead, they see anything they request
as an undeserved gift. I believe the patriarch Jacob expresses a similar
sentiment, when he prays to God in the hours before he meets up again with
Esau: “I am not worthy of all the mercies and of all the truth which Thou hast
done with thy servant; for with my staff I passed over this Jordan (river) and
now I have become two camps. Deliver me, I pray Thee, from the hand of my
brother … ” (Genesis 32:11-12). Despite the fact that God made an explicit
promise to Jacob to protect him in his journeys (Genesis 28:15), when Jacob
prays for God’s help in his coming encounter he does not invoke God’s prior
promise or seek credit for his years of faithfulness despite all the travails
he experienced; all Jacob sees is that he is unworthy.
We can learn a great deal from Moshe and Jacob’s approach in
prayer. We, who cannot stand on a mountain of merit as did our biblical role
models, certainly should not seek God’s gifts based on our inherent goodness.
It would serve us well to adopt a similar attitude of humility and recognize
that whatever blessings we seek of God fit in the category of Divine gifts. If
we take such an approach, our prayers may achieve greater poignancy and our
appreciation of God’s beneficence can grow deeper.